


God's punishment

by redandblue



Category: Hannibal (TV), Hannibal Lecter Series - All Media Types
Genre: 3x13, Aftermath, Disability, Hannigram - Freeform, Hurt Will, Love Crime, M/M, MurderHusbands, Suicide Attempt, The Dragon - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-08
Updated: 2016-02-12
Packaged: 2018-05-12 16:16:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5672302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redandblue/pseuds/redandblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story takes place after the fall in 3x13: The Wrath of the Lamb.</p><p>WARNING: Suicide attempt with bad consequences!</p><p>-------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>He got what he wanted. In a few moments everything, the years of suffering and fighting against his inner monster, would come to an end. No more pretending and regretting.<br/>Living a fake life was unbelievable tiresome. He was so sick of it. </p><p>“Can’t live with him, can’t live without him”</p><p>Bedelia Du Maurier words kept repeating in his head, like a broken recording.<br/>In the end, the best option seemed to be death. For both of them. There was no other way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The fall

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language so please bear with me :P  
> But I hope you like my story nevertheless!

It wasn’t the fall that would kill you, but the sudden stop when you hit the water surface. Your body goes from roughly 75 to 80 miles per hour to nearly zero in a nanosecond.  
You would die one of two ways, or a combination of both. 

 

 **One** , you hit the water and the impact kills you. Sometimes you get knocked unconscious. Other times, you survive for a time. You could be flailing about in the water, trying to stay afloat, only to succumb to the extensive internal bleeding. 

 

Death could take seconds or minutes. 

  

**Two** , you drown. You hit the water going fast, and your body plunges in deep. Conscious or otherwise, you breathe in saltwater and asphyxiate.  
Will didn’t know what he would prefer. But to be honest, none of it mattered anymore. He got what he wanted. In a few moments everything, the years of suffering and fighting against his inner monster, would come to an end. No more pretending and regretting. Living a fake life was unbelievable tiresome. He was so sick of it. 

 

_“Can’t live with him, can’t live without him”_

Bedelia Du Maurier words kept repeating in his head, like a broken recording. 

In the end, the best option seemed to be death. For both of them. This way Will could save further people from getting killed and himself from a lonely life full of regrets, without Hannibal. Even after everything he had done to him, he was willing to forgive him, run away with him and let his inner monster free. Hannibal slowly and carefully had unleashed the monster inside of him. There was no turning back anymore. He became one with the monster and the worst part was - _he liked it._ Slaying the dragon together with Hannibal felt magnificent. And he knew, now that he had felt it, he wouldn’t be able to stop craving for this feeling. 

 

**This was his becoming.**

 

Struggling against it was hopeless. He had accepted it and the weight on his shoulder vanished almost completely. 

His wounds stopped hurting a lot time ago. Now everything he felt were Hannibal’s arms around him, keeping him pressed tight against his torso. He could hear his heartbeat, which calmed him down. 

 

The fall seemed to last for an eternity. Until it suddenly stopped. 

 

The impact was tremendous. Harder that he could ever imagine. They dove in almost straight, feet first, like an arrow hitting the target. Will couldn’t remember when they had changed positions. They were falling head-first only moments ago. 

It wasn’t as painful as he imagined. It was more like a dull ache everywhere on his body. They plunged in deep and were probably still sinking down. Soon he would lose his consciousness and drown. But it was okay. He was here with Hannibal still holding him in his arms. He wouldn’t die alone, that was enough for him. More than he could have ever asked for. 

 

Will was closing his eyes, waiting for death to come, when suddenly a force yanked him upwards. 

“No that was impossible...” Will thought. The arm around his torso was strong and he was too weak to even move a finger. 

Hannibal was pulling them upwards to the surface. Inch per inch with slow swim strokes. Was he really human? Maybe he really was the Devil. Immortal. 

“NO!”, Will was screaming in his head. This was not what he wanted. He wanted to die, finally have peace. Only some meters away before they surfaced he opened his mouth and let the water in, let it fill his lungs. Finally his vision blurred and then went dark. 

___

 

_Will._

Will.

 

Somebody was calling his name. It seemed very far away. He ignored it. 

 

_Will._

Come back Will.

Will.

 

This time it was louder, clearer. He didn’t wanted to go anywhere. He liked it here. It was warm and calm. 

 

**WILL!**

 

His eyes shot open wide. He gasped for air, but no air was filling his lungs. He couldn’t breathe and his lungs were burning. With his last strength he began coughing wild, trying to free his lungs from the liquid inside. 

After what felt like minutes of coughing and spilling out water from his lungs, he finally could take his first breath of air. It felt unbelievably good. The burning in his lungs slowly vanished and his breathing returned to normal. Still dazed from the lack of oxygen in this brain he looked around him. The waves were crashing down some meters away. It wasn’t completely dark, the moon lightened up the shore slightly. Underneath him he could feel the mixture of sharp rocks and sand. 

 

“Will can you hear me?”, the voice said again. It took a moment for Will to focus the person next to him. His vision was still a little bit blurry, but he recognized the person immediately. 

 

“Hannibal?” His voice came out weak and shaking. His whole body was shaking, freezing.

“Hello Will, welcome back.” Hannibal was smiling weakly at him. “Are you okay?”

 

Sure it had to be Hannibal. Who else would manage it to drag them both out of the water, despite his wounds… 

 

With that realization the pain finally hit him with full force. The wound on his check hurt and stung equally as bad as the gaping wound on this collarbone. But now in contrast to before the fall his whole upper body ached with every breath he took. Great he must have broken some rips or even worse. What surprised him was the fact, that the felt no pain in this limps. 

 

He tried to move his legs but froze at the attempt. 

 

 _Nothing._ Nothing was moving. His legs weren’t moving. Not even twitching a little bit, regardless how often he tried to move them. Like they weren’t his own. He must have fractured this spine during the impact, leaving him paralyzed from the waist down. He felt a panic attack rising, but successfully suppressed it. Panicking wouldn’t help him now. And besides, he really hadn’t any energy left for that. 

 

Will let out a small laugh. He wasn’t even able to successfully kill himself. Something that seemed so easy to do.  
And now this. Will couldn’t stop but thinking that this was some kind of punishment from god. Leaving him alive and disabled, with Hannibal still by his side. Unable to get away from him. Literally. The whole situation was ridiculous. 

 

“I have a boat waiting about a mile away.” Hannibal was leaning against a rock beside him, pressing his hand firm on this bullet wound. Blood was soaking his sweatshirt dark red. He looked pale and tired. So Hannibal was indeed human. Bleeding like one, feeling pain like one. 

“You go, I’ll wait here.” Will managed to get out. Maybe, if he was lucky, he would die after all while Hannibal was away. If not, he probably had to accept his fate…

Hannibal stood up slowly and carefully, supported his body on the rock. Will could hear him groaning with pain, pressing his lips tight to a thin line. 

“I’ll be right back.” he assured me. His legs were trembling and he looked like he might faint soon. Too much blood loss, Will thought. But apart from this and his bullet wound he looked okay. No obvious other wounds. Will wondered if there were guardian angels especially for cannibalistic serial killers. If there were, they did a good job! 

 

Will was watching Hannibal slowly stumble away, until he was too far away to see. The ocean was rough and the night sky covered with dark clouds. The sound of the waves made him sleepy. With every passing second his eyelids felt heavier and heavier. Will just wanted to sleep. Sleep and run away from this nightmare. 

Will didn’t know what exactly Hannibal’s plan was. But something told him, that Hannibal may have somehow predicted the fall over the cliff. But how? Did he know him that well?  
After what seemed to be hours Will noticed something at sea. It looked like a tiny boat only a few meters off the shore. Then, a few minutes after, Hannibal stepped out of the water again. Lowering in front of him. 

 

“Come on Will, let’s go on board!” He was about to grab him under his shoulderand pull him up, when Will pushed his hands away. 

“I can’t...leave me here.” At this point Will didn’t even care how much his voice was shaking. He didn’t wanted Hannibal find out what happened. What happen to him. He didn’t wanted to look so vulnerable. So pathetic. 

 

Hannibal seemed irritated for a moment. “Will, we need to go. I need to take care of our wounds.”

He leaned down and put Wills arm around his shoulders trying to pull him up. Midway Will shouted: “I _can’t_ Hannibal! My legs…”

Hannibal stopped moving. His eyes gone wide and he had an unfamiliar expression on his face. He let Will down again and stared at him. 

 

“Will….”

 

“I can’t move my legs Hannibal. Leave me here and get lost! If you ever dare to come back, I’ll kill you! And I won’t fail next time!” Will tried to sound threatening, but his voice was getting weaker and weaker. Hannibals face in front of him began to blur and his vision went black again.


	2. Chapter 2

As always I'm sorry for my imperfect english! But I hope you can enjoy it anyways :D  
__________________________________________________________

 

The first thing Will noticed, the moment he opened his eyes, were the stars and the moon above him. Twinkling bright through the tiny window in the ceiling.  
The weather must have changed again. There were no more dark clouds and he was able to see the clear night sky now. It almost looked unreal, like a painting on the ceiling. But this was real. He was still alive. Somehow Hannibal had managed to carry them both inside the boat's cabin.

The boat was rocking calmly back and forth and his pain was gone. His body wasn’t shaking anymore and he felt comfortable and warm. He looked beside him and noticed an IV- needle sticking in his arm that was joined by tubing to a bag filled with some fluid hanging onto a holder. He figured that the fluid contain some painkillers, otherwise he wouldn’t feel that painless. 

With his free hand Will touched his injured cheek and was surprised when his fingers touched a bandage. His cheek felt tight and he could feel the stitches with his tongue inside of his mouth. The yawning gap had disappeared. Hannibal had stitched it together nicely. A big bandage was also wrapped around his chest, covered his collarbone wound. Hannibal must have done it all while he was unconscious. 

 

Hannibal. 

 

Right… where was he?

 

Will lifted his head slightly to look around the cabin. The moon light shining through the tiny window was strong enough for him to see clearly.  
It was a small room under deck, but large enough for a person to stand up fully. On his right side, he noticed Hannibal sitting on the floor, leaning his back on a wooden cupboard. His chin rested on his shoulder and his hair was covering his face. He was only wearing black briefs and a bandage around his waist. The bandage was already soaked through with dark blood, which made a strong contrast to his sickly pale skin. He looked more dead than alive. 

 

“Hannibal?” Will was calling out for him with a faint voice. Hannibal didn’t show any reaction. 

“Hannibal?” This time Will’s voice was louder than before.

Still nothing. Will could feel panic rise inside him. His heartbeat quickened in his chest and his breathing got fast. Hannibal couldn’t be dead.  
He wasn’t supposed to die. Not without him. 

 

Will ripped out the needle from his arm and threw away the blanket covering him. He wanted to get out of the bed, but was yanked down by his own weight. 

 

His legs. 

He had almost forgot about them. 

 

Now in the moon light he could see that his legs were covered in dark purple-blue bruises and some superficial cuts. But other than that they looked normal. He tried to move them again. With all his strength. Nothing. He examined his legs with his hands. Pinched his skin. Hit down on them. He tried to somehow feel something. Anything. Make them move. 

Still nothing. They didn’t felt like a part of his body anymore. More like a foreign object, holding him down.  
Will didn’t realized that he was crying until his tears fell down on his legs. He wiped them away and took a deep breath. Then another one, until he got calmer again. He had to deal with it for now. There was no other way. 

 

He focused his attention back to Hannibal. He was still leaning limp against the wooden cupboard and was not moving.  
Will pulled himself up with his arms. It took him all his strength to slide himself of the bed. With a soft groan he fell on the floor.  
The distance between him and Hannibal suddenly seemed to be enormous, although it were probably only two meters. 

He drag himself forward, crawled across the floor until he reached Hannibal. With his last strength he pushed himself up against the cupboard beside Hannibal and sighed out of breath. He was too exhausted. His eyes felt heavy and he wanted to go back to sleep again. 

 

“Hannibal…” He tried again, leaning in to the older man. Their faces were now only centimeters away.  
Will could see the man’s sharp cheekbones and full lips, still covered in a little bit of blood. This was the second time, that he was that close to the older man. The first time was only hours ago, before the fall.

 

“Beautiful.” He whispered against the man’s face, like he did before. But this time regarding Hannibal himself. He had to admit, that the man was “beautiful” in his own special and twisted way. 

Will reached one hand up to the man’s nose and relaxed as soon as he could feel his breath.  
Thank god he was still breathing. He would not allow Hannibal to die before him.  
With relieve Will leaned against Hannibal’s shoulder and pulled the blanket over them both, suddenly feeling cold again. In less than probably minutes his eyes fell shut and he was asleep again. 

 

__________________________________________

 

The next time he woke up again, the sun was blinding him through the window. He was still sitting on the floor beside Hannibal, half covered by the blanket.  
But something was differed. A strong arm was now wrapped around him, holding him close. He could feel the warmth of Hannibal’s skin on his, it felt oddly secure.  
Was he supposed to feel that way near Hannibal? 

 

“Good morning Will…I assume you rested well?” 

 

Will jerked at that surprised.

“…you’re awake!” Will noticed and pushed away from the older man. 

 

“Indeed I’m. And so are you.” He was smiling at Will while pulling the blanket back up over Will’s shoulders. 

 

“How are you feeling? Are you in any pain?”

 

“I thought you were dead!”Will blurted out, remembering the last night and ignoring the older man’s question. 

 

“Well, wasn’t that what you actually wanted? Didn’t you feel satisfied? ” Hannibal asked back, while standing up. 

 

“…no I-… not like this! Alone…” Will began to explain. “I wanted us to die together!”

 

“I doubt that.” Hannibal sounded amused and had an oddly soft expression on his face. 

 

“What do you mean?” Will asked sincerely confused.

 

“During our fall you changed our position, so that we would survive.” Will now stared wide eyed at Hannibal.

 

“No…I didn’t. You did!” 

 

Hannibal opened the tiny window and let fresh air flow inside. Then he crouched down again, meeting Wills face. 

 

“It was you Will. You didn’t want us to die. You wanted us to live. Wanted me to live!” His smile was now wider than before, and to Will surprise, seemed real. 

 

Will was speechless. Could he have subconscious change their position, so that they would survive? No, that was not possible. He really wanted to die. Or at least he through that….

 

“What now?” Will asked, trying to change the topic. Unwilling to think about any more about what he could have done and what not. 

 

“We need to get you medical attention.” Hannibal stood up again and went towards the cabin door. 

 

“Well, that applies to you too!” Will pointed out, seeing Hannibal holding his abdomen in pain. 

 

“The bullet went straight through-and-through. No vital organs injured! I’m going to be fine.” Hannibal explained and looked over his shoulder towards Will.

 

“But you need real medical attention. Which I can’t give you here!”

 

“You mean because of my legs?” Their eyes met and Hannibal’s expression changed. “I can’t feel them anymore and there is nothing you could do about it anyway, Hannibal.”

 

_____________________________________________________________________________

I hope you liked the chapter. Next one is going to be longer!


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